Three-day weekends mean even more booze-induced incoherence than usual for us drunk gnomes. So we’ll make this short and sweet to avoid any embarrassing misspellings or heart-felt revelations.
Memorial Day may be a human holiday, but we jump on board those when there’s a miscellaneous day off of work involved. King Jerry made mention that Memorial Day is supposed to be about soldiers fighting in wars and stuff. But try as I might, I haven’t found a soldier or a war all day! All I can seem to find are barbecues, cold beers, and outdoor shenanigans.
Such a pity.
We’ve been riding the coattails of human tradition by…
- Cooking out on an ancient wood-burning stove (reminiscent of the human olden days)
- Going bicycling (in hopes of fitting into my bathing suit by noon today), and
- Planting some flowers (to ensure we have something to pee behind later).
While we don’t expect to remember too many memories of the day, we hope all you gnome and human celebrators make the most of yours.
Wave a freaking flag or something!
ChumbaWambaIGetKnockedDown the Gnome