Some bikers bike for trophies. Others for glory. And still others for GNOMES.

Leave it to Western Australia to come up with a bike race where the prizes are golden versions of us. Australians are always good for a lil’ gnomish jaunt.

South West Cyclists get together on September 8th in Dardanup to compete for the coveted Golden Gnome. It’s called  in the Livelighter Dardanup Tour. And apparently there’s a a bunch of gnomes going out as prizes to make people who suck at biking feel a little better too.

I’ll admit, these little golden guys are pretty badass. However, it does beg the question…should gnomes really be considered trophies?

I mean, you’re a human, right? How would you like it if we hosted a little foot race and gave YOU out as a prize?

You do realize that each one of those golden gnomes had a life of his own before being assigned as you trophy?

But I won’t dwell on it. Well, maybe I already have. News stories like this make me feel torn. One one hand, the bike race is promoting the gnomish spirit of good luck and good cheer to people otherwise unfamiliar with our awesomeness. On the other hand, it is perpetuating the misconception that gnomes are things and not beings. 

I’ll leave you with this: cyclists treat your gnomes well. If your weird human legs can peddle faster than the others, then consider yourself endowed with a responsibility to become a faithful and true gnome guardian. I am trusting that since you like the outdoors enough to bike in it, that you’ll also spend an ample time outdoors with your new golden friend.

Happy biking!
Caesar the Gnome