Gnomes and Coffee


After a hitting the clubs til all hours of the night (and one hour less….thank YOU, Daylight Savings), the first thing on my mind is coffee.

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I love coffee so much that I surgically attached myself to one. Coffee is an essential dietary supplement for all drunk gnomes. If coffee plants all went extinct, gnomes would surely perish as well. A horrific thought….let’s change the subject.

We’re not pretentious about our brew, but we do like it strong. My additives of choice are fruity-tootie creamer and Splenda.

Today’s a double cup coffee kinda day. The gnome on the right mug is sleeping, while the gnome on the left is swinging. Give the “right guy” a little time….he’ll be bouncing off the walls soon enough.

Yours in caffeine,
Caesar The Gnome

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About Caesar

I’m that weird guy in your office who seems to need an IV drip of coffee at all times to function at a normal gnome-like level. Everyone always thinks I must an overworked insomniac and could also really use a shower.

Then one day I try to make out with you in the supply closet. My breath reeks of Bailey’s Irish Cream Liquor! It all makes sense to you now! I’ve never been drinking coffee at all! So you let me make out with you. Eh, why not? You’e probably had worse.

I contribute occasionally in the ‘Gnome Brew Review’ Category. I’m opinionated, sneaky, and like to be handled (wink wink).

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