Make soil, not dirt. Make flowers, not weeds. Make weed, not ditch weed.

My fans always ask me how I put up with that arrogant bastard, McCartney. My answer to them is that every day is an gift to be experienced and to learn from. The more uptight he gets, the defiant I get. The more bossy he gets, the more rebellious I get. He and I have a dynamic that I’m only beginning to understand. I need to go meditate on that for a few hours.

Oh yeah and there’s the other guys too. They’re cool.

I love playing the trumpet because I feel that using my lips so much every day will make me the greatest kisser of all time. Gnomes never thought that trumpets could play reggae, but I have shown them they’re wrong.

I love you all and hope all you fans come to our first show on April 1st! I am not opposed to signing bras, boobs, and any other lady parts that might be flashed at me.

Harmony of the whales,

Lennon The Gnome