86% of the time, gnomes “go missing” because you bore them

From Your Local Guardian Newspaper:

A missing gnome appeal has gone out from a group of traders after their lucky mascot was snatched from his home beneath a Christmas tree.

The 10in gnome was last seen standing beneath the tree outside Budgens, in Stoneleigh Broadway on December 2, a few days after the street’s festive lights switch-on.

Your Local Guardian: Have you seen the missing gnome?

The theft of the smiling yellow, red and green statue was noticed by Stoneleigh councillor Mike Teasdale the following afternoon.

Coun Teasdale said the gnome had become the area’s unofficial mascot after being placed underneath the Broadway’s Christmas tree for the first time last year.

He said: “He has always been a quiet fellow and is unlikely to have wandered away on his own. 

“To date we have not received any ransom demand, so hopefully he will return, or be returned, in the next few days, and then the manhunt can be called off.

“The Christmas tree that he lived under also appears to have been attacked as some branches have been cut off. ”

Coun Teasdale said the miniature marvel only cost £1, but the community saw him as “our gnome”.

He added: “We would love the gnome back because everybody on the Broadway knew him.”

The councillor said the police have not been informed.

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