What’s up with this “Butt-Gnome Religion”?

According to Pascal Press,

“Winston Bedwell held a news conference Saturday asking for help to petition the US government to recognize the establishment a Butt-Gnomes as an official religion. Bedwell was adamant that there are gnomes living in the lower intestines of everyone in the world, and influence how we act and decide our fate in the afterlife.”


Bedwell went so far as to post a photo which he described as a bad Butt Gnome after expulsion.

Religion has always been a bit of a sketchy subject in the gnome community. Although we are not aware of any official gnome religion, many gnomes tend to adopt the religion of their human caregivers. I’ve met a fair share of Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Hindi, and Buddhist gnomes who have a clear understanding of their religious beliefs. However, most of us wander around not knowing what’s real, what’s bullshit, and if there is really any more to life than this.

According to WowWiki, gnomes are generally agnostic, atheists, pagans, communists, and being converted into Cataclysm. Apparently there are Gnomish Holy Light clerics in Nethergarde, but they seem to unstable to worship it en-masse.Seems like we are all over the place, eh?


But now I come across an article about this Butt-Gnome Religion. It seems just about as reasonable as any other religion really. And it seems more relevant to gnomes in general, which we appreciate because we are generally self-centered.

I propose that this Sunday, we hold a Butt-Gnome Religion study group to begin investigating this new belief system and decide whether it fits the needs of The Gnome Abode.

Gnomes of all backgrounds and belief systems are welcome to attend and encouraged to bring your own ideas, suggestions, and snacks. Booze will be provided, of course. Start time shall be 12:00 noon.

Please contact me with any questions about this event, dear wayward gnomes, and we shall find the light together.

Your self-appointed spiritual leader,

The Quick Brown Fox The Gnome

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