The Drunk Gnome

Just when you thought your garden was sober…

The Drunk Gnome

Gnome Sighting in Woodstock, New Hampshire!

There’s a magical place in the hidden town of Woodstock, Hampshire that brews delicious beer. My little gnome nose always directs me to places just like this.

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Humans climb the walls just to get inside. Fortunately, the oldness of the building lets us wee ones slip through the cracks and up to the bar.

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As I stumbled back to my horse-drawn carriage after more than my rationed share off Pig’s Ear Brown Ale. The Woodstock Brewery is pretty much a town in and of itself, so it took awhile to find my way out of it. There’s an inn, a restaurant, a downstairs pub, and lots of tiny rooms that surely shady shit is going down in.

I thought I was hallucinating at first, but I saw two gnomes nearly side by side across the street. The first sighting was a tattoo parlor called Millennium Tattoo, which has been around since ’92.

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Perhaps it’s a wizard in disguise, but whatever…I think it’s a gnome and I’m sticking to it. Stayed tuned for further investigation into gnome tattoos!

Next, I spotted a gnome within an array of miscellaneous garden ornaments at the store next door, called Sunburst.

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The store looked pretty rad, but I was smoking a cigar at the time so they wouldn’t let me in.

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Anyhoo, it’s feels good to keep seeing gnomes living around the Northeast. And believe it or not, they’re not all prepsters out here either. White trash is white trash is white trash, no matter what the zip code. Needless to say, this little rubber gnome fits right in 🙂

‘Til next time,
Rubber the stinkin’ drinkin’ gnome

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