Celebrity Chefs Offer Hope for Gnome Nutrition

A UK-based gardening company has shipped baking-inspired gnomes to some celebrity chefs, like Jamie Oliver and Paul Hollywood.

Will this inspire and train the next generation of gnome chefs to cook better? Historically, gnomes haven’t exactly been the best cooks in the world. But with exposure and celebrity introductions like this, we finally stand a chance to eat well again.

gnomebaker

According to Eddie Riby, Director of UK Water Features, said: “There’s a real passion right now for both growing your own fruit, veg and herbs, and also for cooking home-made meals.

“Our craze for cooking, combined with our love of gardening, means the British Baking Gnome ticks all the right boxes.”

If you check out UK Water Features’ site, you’ll see other gnomes doing more standard gnome things. There is a graduation gnome on there, and props to you buddy…getting a gnome degree is tough stuff! I have some serious concerns about your “Meergnome” though….meerkats and gnomes simply should not be breeding.

meergnome

But back to my original point, I’m excited to see gnomes hanging out with famous humans who know how to cook. We’re sick and tired of ramen noodles and hamburger helper. Our sodium levels are far too high and our taste buds have turned to mush.

The UK isn’t exactly known around here for its mind-blowing cuisine, but we’ll take whatever we can get. Any gnome interested in taking cooking classes, please contact our Practical Homemaking Activities Coordinator, Roxy, via blog reply post. Puh-leeze!!!

Yours truly,
Harrison the Gnome

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About Harrison

Music is the truth, the way, and the light. If I can make one person open up his or her mind to see the songs in the words we speak and the notes in the text we read, I have fulfilled my purpose in this temporary existence.

I play the violin for Amish Meth Lab and I’m throwing up my hands in exultation at the opportunity to play our first gig on April 1st. I’ve played the violin since I was 4 months old and not a single day has gone by since then that I haven’t picked it up and played a few tunes.

Although I thrive upon solitude to sense the sounds of nature and feel the voices spark within my soul, I silently influence my other wayward band mates to find the spirits that will guide them on their path. I’m try to not become consumed with worry that they focus too much on fame and fortune rather than how we can make the world a beautiful place with our hard core folk reggae gifts. I pray that the spirit that rests in me will eventually rest in them.

Namaste,

Harrison The Gnome

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