The Drunk Gnome

Just when you thought your garden was sober…

The Drunk Gnome

Queen of England Receives Gnome (and bunch of worthless jewelry)

queen

“Every item on an official list of gifts given to members of the Royal family last year provides a fascinating insight into how various dignitaries, companies and members of the public have tried to solve the issue of what to give someone who wants for nothing – often with hilarious consequences.” – The Telegraph

royal gnomesNot surprisingly, one of the Queen’s gifts this year was a GNOME. In less interesting news, she also received:

  • a knitted hat with horse ears
  • a plastic angel
  • a book titled Your Arms Remind Me of Pork Luncheon Meat
  • a 5-strand pearl necklace
  • 4 enameled scarab beetles
  • a diamond and tourmaline brooch

According to chief reporter, Gordon Rayner, “Official gifts to members of the Royal family are not their private property, but are held by them on behalf of the Queen. They can be consumed, used or displayed by the Royal family, loaned to galleries or, in the case of gifts worth less than £150, given to charity if they are not likely to be used.”

Hey, Royal Gnome. Hey buddy! Are you being consumed, displayed, loaned, or hanging out in a charity these days? What does the Queen really DO all day? We’re dying to know – write us back, please 🙂

Thinking of you,
Tabitha, Queen of the Gnomes

This entry was posted in Gnome News and tagged , , by Tabitha. Bookmark the permalink.

About Tabitha

I was presented with an opportunity, I seized it, and here I am in this so called “Gnome Abode”. Last weekend, I hesitantly vacated my extravagant mansion with an ocean view in California with one mission: To manipulate the King of the Gnomes into making me his wife so I can rule the gnome world and beyond.

I’ve heard rumors that he’s a pushover. I’ve also heard that the only other female gnome here is a total  skank.

Allow me to introduce myself…I am Tabitha and you will soon be worshiping me as your Queen as I rise in the ranks of high gnome society.

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