African American Gnome Sighting in Minnesota Provokes Questions About Gnome Diversity

Minnesota. Heh. Of all places. Who would have thought an African American gnome would be spotted in that frigid wasteland?!

Shout out to our newest Gnome Scout, Nannerpuss, for this amazing gnome sighting!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nannerpuss’ rare gnome sighting provokes a lot of unsettling questions in our modern gnomish society. Where is the diversity?

Why is seeing an African American gnome such a rarity? Why is it worthy of an entire post devoted to it? Where are the Chinese gnomes? Where are the Hispanic gnomes? Why is so there so much goddamn Whiteness going on?!?

The gnome in this photo is considerably larger than most of our gnomes in The Gnome Abode. For pete’s sake, the top of his cap almost reaches the roof! Is he a different species of gnome? Are there not only different races, but also different species?! Where are they? How can we co-mingle with them and make beautiful mixed race/species gnome hybrid babies?! Assuming their races/species have more chick gnomes than we do, of course.

Somebody has to know something! Somebody answer this post! Especially if you’re a minority! Look at me! My skin color is kinda green. See! Take a closer look! I’m one of you! Take me with you! I won’t let whitey get ya down!

Oh my god, this is so disturbing. I’m so distraught. I’m never going to be able to sleep. I can’t believe this issue has never been raised by anyone in the history of gnomekind as we know it! Why am I the one plagued with the responsibility of solving this gnomewide diversity issue?!

I need a glass of wine and a shot  of NyQuil.

Signing off until the next gnome sighting,

Zookwinkle The Gnome

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