The Drunk Gnome

Just when you thought your garden was sober…

The Drunk Gnome

Dream Interpretation from the Gnomish Subconscious

Some people suffer from a condition where they walk in their sleep, also known as somnambulism.

Other people suffer from a condition where they fall asleep at random times, also known as narcolepsy.

 

 

Still other people suffer from a condition where they eat in their sleep, also known as parasomnia.

Well gnomes don’t suffer from any of those conditions. We have a predisposition to suffer from a condition far worse…..sleep drawing, also known as penangeling.

It’s true. I seem to have developed this common gnome condition where I draw in my sleep. I saw a flyer for a penangeling support group on a light post the other day, but back then I was too naive to think it would ever happen to me.

Then in an instant, my life changed. This morning I woke up at the sound of my alarm, peeled off my eye mash, pushed my snuggly stuffed bunny to the side, and found this monstrosity on the pillow next to me. What the hell is this?! What does it mean! I’ve never even been to South Dakota! Those drops of blood are making me squeamish!

I’ve spent all day scouring the Interweb for an explanation of what the hell my subconscious mind is trying to tell me. This is what Dream Forth (http://www.dreamforth.com/) tells me:

To dream of a hammer suggests hardiness, power, control, and other male values. To dream of the direction south symbolizes anticipation, existence, and uncertainty. To dream about a dragon suggests that you allow your desires and emotions get the best of you.

So…. I’m getting too emotional about the uncertainty of my power? I’m confused. If there are any dream analyst experts out there reading this, please weigh in. I beg you, please. I’m scared to go to sleep tonight for fear of what I will find that I drew tomorrow morning.

Anxiously throwing all of my art supplies into the recycling bin,

Pablo The Gnome

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About Pablo

Just because I mutter incomprehensible and disjointed random shit under my breath from time to time, the other gnomes are trying to get me institutionalized. I ride a bunny rabbit around the yard because I’ve decided that feet are unnecessary. Bunny rabbits make better friends than gnomes anyway and they’re way softer. Ooo! Sparkles!

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