The Drunk Gnome

Just when you thought your garden was sober…

The Drunk Gnome

A Software Company called GNOME?!?

 

Have you ever “Googled” yourself? Now, now. Keep your mind out of the gutter. What I’m asking is have you ever typed your name into Google to see what shows up?

Sometimes the results are surprising. You might find a link to an article you wrote for the junior high newspaper. You might find that police arrest report that you thought had been expunged from your record.

Well in my case, I found that there is a software company called GNOME! Who do they think they are?! Gnomes don’t make software! We can barely run a functional blog website!

According to the company website, “GNOME is an international community dedicated to making great software that anyone can use, no matter what language they speak or their technical or physical abilities,”

How’d they managed to get the domain name gnome.org anyway? I’m not aware of any actual gnomes that work for GNOME. This makes no sense. We are clearly being misrepresented.

They even have a section on their site that explains how the company is “people centered.” Now why the hell would a gnome company be people centered!?

I am putting together a formal complaint with the better business bureau about this so-called GNOME company. I plan to put it in the mail on Monday, so if you find yourself as outraged as I do about this fraudulent business, please send me your contributions.

Their logo is a footprint! We wear boots and we never leave footprints behind! OMG!

Furious!
Phillip The Gnome

This entry was posted in Gnomes on the 9 to 5 by Phillip. Bookmark the permalink.

About Phillip

DISCLAIMER: Due to numerous discrimination lawsuits filed against us, we were court-ordered to include Phillip in our blog. Phillip is adamantly opposed to all forms of alcohol and debauchery.

He works a 9-5 job pushing papers around. Rumor has it that he’s an accountant in Pittsburgh, but when you ask him directly, he is never able to provide a clear answer as to what he does for a living. He refuses to wear anything except three-piece suits, and we had to roofie him to stuff him into this traditional gnome outfit for his profile picture.

We welcome you to send Phillip as much hate mail as possible.

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