Humans seem to have all sorts of lists about how to prepare for impending doom snowstorms. Stocking up on survival items and keeping warm always top their lists.
We gnomes, however, have our OWN list! This is how we plan to get through this nasty Midwest day.
- Snowboard on garden tools rather than walking to avoid slippage
- Wear the super-insulated pointy hat in the back of your closet
- Call in an order for beer delivery and make some poor sap bring it to you
- Hitch a ride atop human’s cars rather than trying to see above the snowy wheel yourself
- Refuse to do any work, even if you work from home
- Wear contacts instead of glasses so they don’t get all snow-spotted
- Set out all of your dishes on the front porch to catch as much as you can to melt into deliciously chilled drinking water
Hang in there gnomies…
Dr. A. Chu, MD, Chinese medicine professional and general gnomish advice giver