Beware of Zombie Gnomes Awakening!

NEWS ALERT!

RESIDENTS OF THE GNOME ABODE BEWARE!

ONE ZOMBIE GNOME HAS RISEN FROM THE DEAD!

Cowabunga The Gnome was attacked in the southeast corner of The Abode last night. This marks our first zombie gnome attack of 2012.

The first zombie gnome to wake up is a chick, which is especially unsettling. She has a dark green hat, light purple dress, green skin, and big boobs. Other “sleeper cell” zombie gnomes were spotted lurking in the shadows. It is surely only a matter of time before they also wake up and join their big-boobed companion in the eating of brains.

Once the 911 call came in from GPD, I sent out a dispatch for reinforcements. A beefy zombie gnome hunter promptly arrived on the scene. The hunter quickly subdued that nasty bitch and freed Cowabunga from her oozing grasp.

Keep your eyes open and your tasers ready, my dear gnomes. There’s only 27 days until Halloween, so we all need to be on our guard now more than ever.

May your brains stay with you,
Jerry, King of The Gnome Abode

This entry was posted in Gnome Scout Sightings by Jerry. Bookmark the permalink.

About Jerry

I am the king of all of the gnomes. You can bow down to me now. No, seriously I mean it. BOW!

I earned the title of Gnome King because I was the very first gnome that our glorious Master/Goddess picked up one hazy day at dollar store in DeKalb, Illinois. I carry a hoe because I’m just THAT pimp. As you can see, I love to smoke various substances and get tangled up in things.

I have everything to say about everything and I’m sure that I have made your life worth living again. You’re welcome.

 

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