Official Gnome Police Report: There’s a Flasher on the Loose!

CASE NO.: 29831 1/2

DATE: December 4, 2013

REPORTING OFFICER: Sgt. SpeakNoGnome

DETAIL OF EVENT: An unidentified gnome wearing little more than heart-shaped boxers was spotted on the corner of Mushroom Lane and Miniature Boulevard this morning at approximately 11:32 am. Said gnome wore a bathroom and opened it to expose an unmentionable atrocity at female gnomes standing around minding their own business.

SUSPECT IN QUESTION: We currently have no leads. A paparazzi photograph is shown below, however, we have no name to place with the….ahem….face. Any information should be directed to www.thedrunkgnome.com or [email protected]ahoo.com. A handsome reward may be offered.

flasher

ACTIONS TAKEN: None. I’m still trying to wash the shock and shame from my little gnome eyes.

SUMMARY: There’s a flasher on the loose! No gnome needs to see this. If you can identify this exposed individual, please contact GPD immediately.

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