St. Paddy’s Day Recap


It’s March 18th in the afternoon. You know what that means…we gnomes are finally waking up from our St. Patrick’s Day hangovers. We’re hungry, we’re cranky, we have to pee, and we have no idea who is lying next to us. Surely, you can relate.

A lot of the gnomies were lame this year and didn’t start getting their party on ’til the sun had risen. Lil’ Dimwit and I were the exceptions to the rule. Fortunately, someone kept snapping pics of us throughout the day. That’s how we know that we hung out together, after all.

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Full beer = happy Horace

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Empty beer = sad Horace

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Lil’ Dimwit never knows how to drink a beer his own size. Rappers are such lushes.

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At some point, I’m pretty sure he guaranteed me a dance break solo in his next music video. God I hope that wasn’t just the beer talking. I’ve been waiting for my big break for so long…that’s really why I hang out with the dude to begin with. He’s kind of a tool otherwise.

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No idea who this dude was. If this is you, text me. I think I have your sweater.

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Five beers are better than one. This is not a holiday for minimalism.

Best of luck to you all and your hangover recovery.