EXCLUSIVE Gnome Facebook Photos! LIKE US!

 

All of us chipped in and recently got ourselves a fancy new iPhone. We all have to share it, but that’s okay because it’s hard for us to push those big touch screen “buttons” all alone  anyway! phone

In addition to providing all you gnome fans with a daily (almost always!) post about our shenanigans, we are now ALSO posting random pics of each other on Facebook!

They’re super fun, sometimes scandalous, and usually drunk 😉

But these are FACEBOOK EXCLUSIVES and found NOWHERE else on the Interwebs!

To get a sneak peak into the behind-the-scenes shenanigans, you have GOT to LIKE us on Facebook! It’s so easy a troll could do it!

Just go to our Facebook page and click “like”. And SHAZAAM! A daily picture of one of us will start to appear in your news feed!

Because after all…don’t you need a little more gnome in your day?

xoxo,
ChumbaWamba The Gnome

Pour Me Another Rum and Diet!

 

IMAG0505According to Samir Vermani, M.D., of the ABC News medical unit, we can get more drunk by using diet soda as a mixer!

COOL! SIGN ME UP!

“Cutting calories with diet soda may seem like a good idea — as long as it’s not at a bar.

A new study released in the journal Alcoholism suggests that cutting alcoholic drinks with diet soda makes them more potent than using their full-calorie counterparts. Specifically, researchers found that mixing alcohol with diet (sugar-free) soft drinks resulted in a higher breath alcohol content than mixing alcohol with a regular (sugar-sweetened) soft drink.

“The results were surprising,” said Cecile A. Marczinski, assistant professor in the department of psychological science at Northern Kentucky University, and one of the lead investigators of the study.

IMG_1037Researchers served one of three beverages: vodka added to a diet drink, vodka added to a regular drink or a regular soft drink with a vodka scent added so that participants would believe it was an alcoholic beverage. They then sat back while the subjects enjoyed their cocktails.

Those participants drinking the vodka-diet drink cocktails had a significantly higher breath alcohol content and had the highest degree of behavioral impairment among the groups, the study found.

“We are talking about significant differences here,” Marczinski said. “Participants who drank diet soda with vodka had blood alcohol contents as high as 18 percent more than when sugar-containing mixers were used.”

IMG_8124The theory behind this is that sugar-containing drinks stimulate the stomach much like a meal does. Having some food in your stomach delays stomach emptying, thus delaying absorption of alcohol into the bloodstream. The result is that drinkers get a less-potent hit of alcohol in their systems after drinking.

“This is why southern European countries have lower rates of alcoholism despite their increased alcohol intake,” said Petros Levounis, director of the Addiction Institute of New York, who was not involved in the study. “They always drink while eating.”

Diet beverages, since they contain no sugar, do not trigger the stomach to delay emptying, allowing alcohol to reach the bloodstream more quickly.

“The choice of what you mix your alcohol with can make a difference,” Marczinski said, adding that there may even be potentially harmful consequences for those who regularly request a diet soda with their spirits.

IMG_7076“In the long run, it’s more harmful for your body to be exposed to a higher alcohol concentration than a few extra calories,” she said.

But not all alcohol experts agree that going diet with your cocktails is all that different. Boris Tabakoff, a professor of pharmacology at the University of Colorado School of Medicine, pointed to the fact that study subjects drank the equivalent of three to four drinks over a five-minute period.

“Few if any bars will serve you a drink that strong,” he said. “If you want to chug your alcohol to the point of consuming the equivalent of three to four drinks in five minutes, you should not worry about calories.”

Tabakoff further pointed out that calorie-conscious drinkers might do better simply to limit their alcohol intake, noting that alcohol, too, is packed with calories.”

Copyright © 2013 ABC News Internet Ventures

I may be a doctor, but first and foremost, I am a drunk gnome.

Yours in drunk health,
Dr. A. Chu, M.D., The Gnome

Brewing Up Some Tasty Goodness

 

Think there’s enough amazing gnome-themed beers out there?

brew2

Not a chance!

From time to time (okay fine….MOST of the time) we turn The Gnome Abode into a brewery and make our very own special brews. Here’s what is in the works:

  1. Chocolate Milk Stout – Drinkable 2/21/13
  2. Maple Nut Ale – Drinkable on 3/8/13
  3. Cherry Wheat Ale – Drinkable 4/28/13
  4. Belgian Tripel – Drinkable 5/2/13

brew1

Brewing is a tough gig. It takes a lot of precise measurements and careful sanitation….both of which are difficult to maintain when drunk. But if they aren’t maintained, the beer will taste like crap! Life is rough, man.

To solve this age-old problem, we have decided to take shifts. Each brewer gnome has taken a vow of periodic sobriety and promised to not be drunk for two hours each day. This may not sound like much to you, but to drunk gnomes….it feels like an eternity. I’m on my two hour sobriety shift right now. I’ve checked all the buckets already so killing time on the blog and whatnot.

Whoop look at the time…..shift’s almost over so I gotta run. We look forward to sharing our brews with you in the months ahead!

Cheers!
Leonardo, Head Gnome Brewer

 

Hunting Gnomes at the Morton Arboretum

 

Tired of hearing about how amazing we gnomes are? Well you have less than ONE MONTH LEFT to hunt us!Entrance, Children's Garden, Morton Arboretum

The Morton Arboretum in Lisle, Illinois continues to offer a Gnome Hunt in their childrens’ garden through the end of February. They present us all with the seemingly impossible challenge,

Can you find all of the gnomes hiding in the Children’s Garden?

td_tock_thingstodo_gnomehuntDirections are presented at the entrance of the garden to advise how many gnomes to look for, where to look, etc.

As vocal gnome activists, we fear for the lives of our brethren in Lisle, Illinois. We have reached a general consensus that we will storm the gates of the arboretum and rescue as many gnomes as possible before they are hunted by people LIKE YOU.

Who KNOWS what you’ll do with us if you are successful in your hunting endeavors!? We don’t trust you. Hunt away! We’re not scared! You’re no match for our wit and hiding abilities!

Armed n’ ready,
Starr The Gnome

Gnomes and the Super Bowl

 

Believe it or not, we gnomes are really into the human Super Bowl. For years now, I’ve been trying to organize the GFL (gnomish football league) but I can’t seem to get enough guys to participate. So many of these wimps are freaked out about getting their fragile ceramic hands broken and whatnot.

You know what I say….MAN UP! But alas, one gnome cannot play football alone. That’d just be weird. And logistically impossible.

So while my dude counterparts may be lame, we are all pumped for today’s game. My new favorite player is this linebacker on the 49’ers. Looks like it’s been a rough few last games for this lil’ bugga.

zombie

(Checkout Darkside Creations on ebay for more awesomeness).

Need more proof that gnomes are into football? Check out how many gnomes from various teams are sporting their teams colors! Some of you have referred to these gnomes as “sell-outs”…mere props for sports fans to give as gifts to other sports fans.

Personally, I have a lot of respect for these sports team gnomes because they have found a way to appeal to a broader audience and increase our presence in an otherwise ambivalent community of television zombies. Do you really think that sports fans would give a shit about us otherwise?! Probably not. So sports gnomes…..I salute you! Keep fighting good fight and I’m right there with you (in true Michigan spirit).

baltimore-ravens-garden-gnome

So no matter who you’re rooting for this evening…we truly hope that you are rowdy, obnoxious, and appropriately drunk.

san fran

Sure there’s the commercials and the puppy bowl, but honestly the booze is really what it’s all about here in The Abode.

Happy Super Bowl Day!
Benjamin The Gnome