Gnome Groping in New Zealand

I stumbled upon a blog today that discussed gnome groping. I feel that this topic has not yet been addressed the The Drunk Gnome and that is unfortunate.

In the article, some random New Zealand blogger recounted a visit to Christchurch Art Gallery, which is celebrating its 10th anniversary outdoor artwork consisting of gnomes. At first, I was skeptical. “Christchurch” didn’t exactly sound like a place where gnomish spiritual practices would be welcome. However, a browse around their website proved me wrong.

chromegnome

Christchurch Art Gallery calls them “tin men” but these are clearly over-sized gnomes. Sculptor, Gregor Kregar, did such a splendid job….don’t you think?

Anyway, back to the groping.

As our New Zealand blogger friend mentions, gnome groping is not cool. Not without consent, anyway. And never by children.

We have rights too, you know. And feelings. If we want you to grope us, you’ll know.

This is an anti-groping public service announcement for gnomes worldwide. Thank you, New Zealand for reminding us about this important issues. And for building a huge freaking gnome!

Yours truly,
DJ Spaghetti Sauce, the gnome

Why You Shouldn’t Steal Gnomes in New Zealand

 

The po-po charge you $250…even if you’re just stealing one of us for your mum.

Student stole gnome for mum
Last updated 07:34 22/03/2013
A Palmerston North student has been fined after stealing a garden gnome from a woman’s property on
his way home from a night out drinking.
Police found Christopher William Field, 18, in possession of the gnome, which he said he’d taken for his
mother.
“You keep to the footpath on the way home,” Judge Gregory Ross told him in the Palmerston North
District Court yesterday.
On a charge of theft, Field was fined $250.
– © Fairfax NZ News

 

Consider yourselves forewarned.

King Jerry of the Gnomes