Leave it to the UK to crank out awesome headlines like “Gnomes in police custody after night-time adventure.”
Apparently, someone was driving around the Banff area with 33 gnomes and some other miscellaneous lawn ornaments in the back of a van. The driver was pulled over (for some reason?) and the gnomes were identified as those belonging to residents of the Aberdeenshire area.
What a joyride!
Scotland’s favorite schoolboy, Oor Wullie, was joyriding along with the renegade gnomes as well. A schoolboy….what fun! The gnomes are believed to have been taken from local residences between Wednesday and Thursday this week.
If you’re missing a gnome or know someone who is, The Courier newspaper may be able to get you reconnected. Send an email over to [email protected]. The police could probably use a little help reuniting gnomes with gnome owners too, if you could lend a helping hand.
Keep in mind, this is BREAKING NEWS and we don’t have the full details of the story yet.
- Who IS the driver of the van?
- What IS his/her connection to the gnome community?
- Where were they all going on that joyride?
- Were the gnomes kidnapped or did they leave their homes willingly?
You’d better bet our gnome sleuths are on the case. Tip us off if you hear anything!
Lieutenant SpeakNoGnome, the Gnome
We gnomes have been super crafty over here lately. Supposedly, it’s springtime, but neither our tiny toes nor our gardens have yet to thaw out. Believe it or not, I actually started taking a sewing class. These chunky fingers have more than their fair share of challenges, but it’s been therapeutic and I’m hoping to have a gnomemade skirt finished soon!
I wanted to share with you another artist who is near and dear to my heart.
Her name is Alison and she runs Yellowbelly Crafts. Alison makes really awesome gnomes in Lincolnshire in the UK! Perhaps you came across Ron the Gnome’s shout-out about her business in the most recent edition of International Gnome Club newsletter.
Alison started making ceramics in 2004 after attending local classes. She uses kilns and molds in her production area to create gnomes, mushrooms, and garden areas. Take a look at these little guys…they’re pretty rad if you as me. And you didn’t, but I told you anyway. Prices range from about £30 to £55.
All the posted craft fair dates are from 2012, but I hope you’re planning on making some public appearances this year, Alison! Awesome work!
Tabitha the Gnome
Photo credit: Yellowbelly Crafts
A parked car in Wesley Close, Charmouth, was damaged by a garden gnome when the heavy concrete ornament was placed on the vehicle’s roof.
Last Sunday, a black Citroen DS3 fell victim to a gnome who was ON A RAMPAGE.
Photo credit: Big Kid Small City
The unidentified gnome smashed in the car’s rear windscreen and offside rear window. British people are so weird….what the heck are those car parts?! In America, we just call ’em all windows.
Gnomes like this give us a bad reputation. If you have any information as to where this gnome is from, what his name is, or what his deal is, you might want to call the police. Apparently, the shit went down on 2/23/14 between 1:30 am and 2 am. Get your facts straight and no blackmailing, okay?
P.S. – The crime reference number is 007708.
Your local law enforcer,
SpeakNoGnome, the gnome