Howdy folks, your favorite travel gnome here! You might have seen my buddy Rubber’s recent post about going rock climbing in New Hampshire.

Well we climbed alright, and climbing is really difficult for gnomes. Our legs are short, our arms are weak, and our bellies are somewhat large. For you humans, rock climbing might involve going several feet into the air. For gnomes, we’re generally satisfied with climbing a couple of inches. I mean seriously…some of us are barely a couple inches tall in the first place!

No matter who you are though, climbing makes you thirsty. And nothing quenches post-climbing thirst quite like beer. There’s also nothing that feels better than wrapping your sore, tired hands around a frosty pint glass filled with hoppy goodness.

We celebrated this particular survival on the rocks at Moat Mountain Brewery in North Conway, New Hampshire. I never saw a moat, but I did see a mountain. Therefore, I gave the brewery a 50/50 chance of impressing me.

The place is in a big yellow house with shit for signage, so I actually passed by it and nearly flipped my gnome jeep trying to get in the parking lot. Things got a little better once I learned they do $5 samplers.

Violet’s Blueberry was definitely my favorite beer of the bunch. It had a yummy smell that reminded me of blueberry muffins. Unlike other fruity beers, it wasn’t over-carbonated either.

I didn’t have many thoughts flowing through my little gnome brain as I drank the Iron Mike Pale Ale or the Czech Pilsner. The Bone Shaker Brown pleasantly surprised me though. It had a roasted, nutty taste, a translucent color, and a full-bodied taste without any annoying bitterness. The Square Tail Stout was quite nice too with its roasted flavor.

I watched some soccer on the flat screen TV even though I don’t understand why that ball is so worthy of running after.

To top off my drinking day, Rubber and I split a 16 oz Belgian Triple, which was so sweet that a couple of my precious gnome teeth rotted out right then and there.

My expert recommendation? Stop in for a Violet’s Blueberry 22 oz bomber to-go and hike around the mountains ’til a moat magically appears in a drunken hallucination.

Cheers!
Zookwinkle the drinking/traveling gnome