Monthly Archives: April 2013

Street Artists in Napa Valley Set the Stage for Lamignomes

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Gnomes just keep popping in California. Not even Napa Valley is safe!

napagnomeAccording to an article today in the Napa Valley Register, paintings of gnomes and mushrooms are springing up all over wine country. The 4×5 inch wooden paintings attached to trees and utility poles are wonderfully reminiscent of the recent gnome sightings in Oakland, California.

It seems the gnomes are making their way throughout the state!

Some of these new Napa gnomes are even wearing kilts. Now, I’m not so sure about that. None of us have ever worn a kilt. I don’t even know any Scottish gnomes. Someone, please explain this kilt-wearing to me.

If you’re in the Napa area, check for these newbies on Imola and Jefferson streets. It seems that the utility companies aren’t even gonna try to mess with these Napa gnomes. Hooray! They’re safe!

Things brings me to my next point…Lamignomes. Have you ever seen a laminated gnome on a Popsicle stick in a weird location. Well if you haven’t, you probably will soon enough.

laminatingRumor has it that TheDrunkGnome is in collaboration with www.lamignomes.com, which is a delightful work in progress. Although these allegations are unconfirmed, stay tuned for updates about laminated gnomes, where they’re hiding, and how to keep track of them.

All in all, we are really loving all of the gnome artists that keep making news around the country. Keep up the good work!

Love,
Horace the Gnome

Photo Credit: J.L. Sousa via Napa Valley Register/Tom Borowski via Flickr

Gnome Leads Anti-Litter Effort on Staten Island

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statenAccording to the Staten Island Advance, a gnome is leading the charge against litterers in New York. You go, gnome!

“We want to be known as the borough of parks, not the borough of litter,” Deputy Borough President Ed Burke said, against a backdrop of empty beer cans and dumped tires.

earthdayMy fellow environmental activist gnome, who goes by Garbage Gary, is set to make an announcement in the near future. So clean up yo’ shit, Staten Island or you’ll have a whole heap of pissed off gnomes banging down your garbage-filled houses.

Happy Earth Day, everyone!

Peace,
Ramon LeBeef the Gnome

Photo credit: Ryan Lavis

Gnomes Discover Ancient Culture in Pictograph State Park

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l stepped out of the Montana Brewing Company the other day after a few too many gnome-sized samplers with my travel companion, Rubber. I realized it was still daylight. My instincts took over.

You see, we make great travel companions…Rubber and I. He’s more the drinker and I’m more the adventurer. However, we both appreciate each other’s worthwhile point of view. We balance each other out.

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Before heading to Carter’s Brewing Company that day for continued wastedness, I convinced him to accompany me to Pictograph State Park in Billings, Montana.

The prehistoric (human, not gnome) hunters who camped in the caves here left behind a shit ton of drawings on the cave walls and artifacts. People who know what they’re talking about say the art in the cave is over 2,000 years old.

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Sheesh that light was blinding. It was all I could do to cover my eyes and squint into the sub par gPhone camera.That Ghost Cave was creepy as hell. Come to think of it, they make me look somewhat ghost-like as well.

Rubber and I hiked the Pictograph Cave trail and the Ghost Cave trail. They weren’t long trails, which was much of a relief. These tiny ceramic legs have a hard time keeping up with his more flexible ones.

Anyhoo, I’d recommend this stop very much if you like weird old art, if you’re kind of a pansy when it comes to hiking, and if you have $5 to spare.

Signing off ’til my next travel tip….
Sheldon the Gnome

Gnome Rebels Surround Cop in Australia

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Gnomes are infiltrating Australia once again!

According to The Flinders newspaper, a group of gnomes were recently discovered surrounding the “silent cop” in the middle of the main intersection in the town of Gladstone. Ballsy.

gnomeaustraliasignGnomes have been threatening local officials so much that they’ve agreed to give the country fair a “gnome theme.”

Australian gnomes have also been spotted behind bars at the local post office. Apparently, going to the post office in Australia is even worse than it is in the States. At least we don’t get imprisoned for wanting to mail letters here.

Well that’s your ’round-the-world update, folks. If any of your Aussie gnomes out there care to explain your recent rowdy behavior, we’d love to hear it. No judgement…promise! Just looking for some ideas to start our own revolution in the mountain states…

Your truly,
Humps the Gnome

Photo credit: The Library Faerie

Gnome Brew Review – Montana Brewing Company, Billings

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If you’ve been following me around lately, you can probably tell that Montana has a good number of breweries. And you already know how much we gnomes love a good local brew!

Just take a look at the Montana Brewer’s Association trail map….what a great idea….a map of trails AND beer. Genius!

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Not all of the state’s breweries are part of the association though, and therefore aren’t listed. Like this one….Montana Brewing Company in Billings. Here’s what they got on tap:

-MBC Wheat
-MBC Pale Ale
-MBC Amber
-Apricot Wheat
-Single Hop Nugget IPA
-Holy Hooligan’s Double Red
-Custer’s Last Stout
-Bright Eyed & Bushy Tailed Breakfast Brown Ale

 

 

 

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As usual, I had to try them all. Out of all the breweries I visited in Billings (yes, there were three and would have been four if the other wouldn’t have been closed…Bastards.), this one was the most high-class and family-friendly. I felt a bit too skanky to be here with my muddy boots and wind-blown hat.

Good thing I didn’t give a crap and just bellied up to the bar for some liquid courage!

mbcMy absolute favorite was the Smoked Rye, which I see they don’t even have on tap anymore. Figures. It had a wonderfully smoky taste that reminded me of being out at the campfire. Now don’t get me wrong…I’ve had my share of smoky beers.

I remember trying the Smoke beer at Against the Grain brewery in Louisville, Kentucky a few months back. That was just too freaking smoky. I couldn’t taste anything because my mouth was full of ash! Last night, I tried the scotch ale, which was supposed to be smoky, at Madison River Brewing in Belgrade, Montana. I couldn’t taste any smoke at all!

growler beerI quit cigarettes years ago, but I still like a damn good smoky beer when I find one. I picked up a growler of it at MBC and promptly finished it on the walk home.

So MBC….THERE is your first brew review by a gnome. You’re welcome.

Sincerely,
Rubber the Perpetually Drunk Gnome